I'll talk about Halloween a little bit later. I must clear and expurgate myself of a nerving matter. I proposed the following question last night:
you meet someone. you are rather interested in them. you go on a date, but he/she quickly conveys that are not ready to date now due to a number of priorities in their life. they want to be friends, and you try to go along with it by being a good sport.
couple months later this same person comes to you and asks you for dating advice regarding someone.
do you have a right to be offended/upset?
I received the following responses:
Well than at least now you've seen his true color. You wouldn't want to be with a flake anyways. You know? You'll find someone that's honest and upfront with you from the start the way you want them to be. Don't settle for anything less than what's important to you.
YES! He sounds like a coward.
i would be offended and a little irritated, personally.
it might be okay if you were long time friends and had developed that kind of a relationship, but considering i'm assuming that this is about chris...i'd be a bit pissed.
I don't have a problem with him being interested in someone. My only qualm is being told one telling, not being able to date someone due to overwhelming priorities, then contradicting/downplaying you told someone that, THEN making it seem as if I am exaggerating this. I'm not inventing anything. I remember peoples words as well as their actions, and I hold them amenable to their vindications. If one can't own up to their previous renditions, well that says enough in order for me to make a critical discernment of their character. If this happened more than 6 months ago, I might have a margin of understanding, but this was about 8 weeks ago.
I probably should of rationalised this better before, but he seemed like his intentions were sincere. Though my patience only fourth goes for so long until these all and well intentions become dumbfounded by inconsiderateness, and I must expand in professing, flakiness, too.
I dealt with precarious friendships/relationships in my first 5 years of being out and gay. I'm all too familiarized from such experiences to know what's genuine, and what's spurious.